Inside UPL WhatsApp Group: Mockery As Magogo Preaches Club Pro Agenda


Disclaimer:
This is artistic work of fiction – Names, characters, places and events are the imagination of the writer. Any resemblance between these characters and real teams is purely coincidental.

Check out out Episode 1, Episode 2 and Episode 3


ADMIN: Mr President it’s good to have you here.

Magogo: You are welcome.

Onduparaka: Now that the FUFA President is here, it’s good to air out all our grievances.

Magogo: Not now, I am here to throw more light on the ongoing Club Pro Agenda.

MYDA: ????

Express:

Kyetume: @MYDA, what’s your problem.

MYDA: I hear pro agenda, we waited for the FUFA officials at the venue, only to shun us during the last hour that they will not come to Malaba because its a Covid19 risk district.

Magogo: @MYDA, I understand your problem, but the issue has been forwarded to the concerned and my team will handle it with the respect it deserves.

Wakiso: Kyoka omusajja yali asasude ne Hotel. Obu ssente bwo!

Villa: So, Mr President, will MYDA be refunded?

Magogo: We will discuss that later on..

Mbarara: Aahh, anti atandise olimba.

Busoga: That aside, I think this Club Pro-Agenda is a good initiative for us, we learnt a lot and I thank FUFA very much.

Wakiso: @Busoga, untypical of you. Walidde?

Villa: How do we benefit from the whole process?

Magogo: In simple understanding, the Club Pro Agenda is intended at driving clubs from amateur to professionalism. It’s designed to help clubs build strong brands that will be trusted and desired by the fans and other football consumers.

Wakiso: Away from Club Pro Agenda, season ejja yo etandika ddi? Mpozzi nekirala, Akassente ko President ka Covid19 relief fund nga tokogerako?

ADMIN: English please.

Wakiso: ?

Onduparaka: @Wakiso seconded. Can the President first tell us about the Covid19 relief fund… how much will each club get.. because we are suffering financially.

Express: @Onduparaka, where did you get the money to sign new coach Bainomugisha Vialli???‍♂️??‍♂️??‍♂️

ADMIN: Clubs, let’s remain focussed to the big issue at hand.

Magogo: This Club Pro Agenda will help you generate money and improve your standards.

Vipers: How? Hahaha

Magogo: Some clubs are not respecting their brands to the extent that they are taking everything for granted starting with the way they conduct player unveilings.

Kyetume: Hahaha… MYDA come here. You unveiled a player in sandals!!

MYDA: At least we unveiled a player, but there are so called giants here who don’t unveil their players, you just get to know their new signings on the pitch when the season kickoff.

Vipers: Hope you are not talking about Express and Villa

Express: @Vipers: Any word you say will be used against you in the courts of law.

Vipers: Here, we know football courts.

Magogo: So, with the Club Pro Agenda, we wat to help you deliver your short and long-term plans.

Bright Stars: When are you talking about finances?

Magogo: Finances fall in the key pillars of club pro agenda. Others include Structures, Medical, facilities, Stadium, Senior team, youth setup, marketing, fans, communication and event management.

KCCA: Preach preach…

Kyetume: Ebyokunyonyola byo Magogo abisobola.

Police:

Mbarara: @Magogo, You can now tell us why our players are failing to make it abroad.

Vipers: @Mbarara, Hehehe have you ever sold any player abroad?

Magogo: @Mbarara, That is what I have been talking about, Club pro agenda is here to make clubs migrate to professionalism so that our players don’t always crave to go for “pro.” But like I say, you clubs have not done enough to help these players as well. You don’t prepare these players very well before sending them out.

KCCA: Sibategeke yadde ??‍♂️??‍♂️??‍♂️??‍♂️

Vipers: @KCCA, say nothing, you have also gone for old players like Denis Iguma and letting the likes of Jackson Nunda leave. You can no longer produce your own.

Villa: Hehehe, I am enjoying this convo ?

Express: @Villa, do you have any player left? last heard when Mutanda was also leaving. Club teggwawo?

Police: Hahaha.

Kyetume: @Police, oseka ki nga ozimba bazimbulula, Wakiso already signed your best player in Pius Kaggwa!!

Police: @Kyetume, so how is that your concern?

Busoga: 1-1

(Bright Stars changed name to Soltilo)

BUL: Now see this Japanese here.

Magogo: @BUL, make sure that your new home, that is Kyabazinga Stadium Bugembe, meet all the requirements. Don’t just wait for the last days and start panicking.

Vipers: When will Villa get a home?

Wakiso: Namboole yiyo? ???

Magogo: Away from your banter guys, but this Licensing process should not be an inconvenience, but look at it as a tool of development towards self sustaining. Its one of the ways that will help us as FUFA to reach our target of becoming the number one football country in Africa.

Proline: Are you also going to explain to us why the league was ended without our knowledge?

Maroons: ??

Tooro: Otyo …


What next? Watch out for Episode Five next Sunday

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