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Inside UPL WhatsApp Group: We Received Peanuts

This is artistic work of fiction – Names, characters, places and events are the imagination of the writer. Any resemblance between these characters and real teams is purely coincidental.

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ADMIN: Hey, like you are all aware that FUFA approved appropriation of the FIFA Covid19 relief grant of $500,000.

Wakiso: Yeah, we are aware. Tell us something new.

URA: Peanuts

Magogo: Peanuts? Its Sh32M for each club.

MYDA: Its timely. Thank you FUFA.

Kyetume: @MYDA, but you are not receiving Sh32m, you will receive Sh15m because you were in Big League hehehe

Vipers: Little money. That cannot cover quarter of my monthly expenses. Clubs deserved a bigger portion from the $5000,000

KCCA: Seconded. Its a drop in the ocean, but anyway, we shall take it.

Villa: Nyama ntono okayana eri mu nkwawa. Katusooke tuzifuna.

BUL: But when is the money arriving?

ADMIN: It will reflect on your accounts in two weeks time.

Magogo: But sadly, some of you are yet to send to us your bank accounts.

Busoga: I have a big problem, even the previous prize money for the league was sent on a wrong account. As a club, we changed our account number.

Mbarara: Talk about disorganisation ???

BUL: ??‍♂️??‍♂️??‍♂️

Vipers: I will give you an example here from the neighborhood, each club in the Rwanda Premier League will receive RWF28m which is sh106m in our currency. This is Rwanda imagine. There second division clubs will fetch Sh38m, can you imagine?

Kyetume: Vipers olina bwiino.

Wakiso: Thanks to their new Sporting Director??‍♂️

KCCA: Bla bla bla. We all know who will call the shots at the end of the day.

Express: ??

Kyetume: @Express, naawe watuyiyeemu coach wa Rugby. Kamutomere ffe league nga ezeemu.

(Admin removes Kyetume)

ADMIN: We said English

Vipers: Bring Kyetume back, we are discussing important matters here.

Express: Nothing important because nothing will be changed. FUFA has already decided.

Onduparaka: Mr Express, been looking for you. Why don’t you pick my calls?

Express: What’s the matter?

Onduparaka: Your so called new signing Abel Eturude. He is still contracted with us.

Villa: Hahahaha. Forward your matter to FUFA.

Express: It will be a waste of time.

MYDA: But Onduparaka ain’t a saint either. Nebbi Central said that Your Jerry Jakisa is still their player as well yet you unveiled him recently.

ADMIN: Guys, let’s remain on track.

Bright Stars: Like we said, Sh32m is little. We appreciate your efforts as FUFA but we should have received much more than that.

Vipers: Many beneficiaries on that FIFA loaf. I don’t know where they came from. Did they just create them out of the blue?

KCCA: @Vipers seconded. How on earth is FUFA Administration getting Sh30m. Sijui that Restart of competition will take Sh176m. SIGs sh105 for what?

Magogo: SIGs are Special interest Groups.

BUL: What’s that?

Magogo: Like Uganda Football Coaches Association, Uganda Football Referees Association, Uganda Women Football Association, Uganda Football Players Association etc

Wakiso: But that’s where I get confused. In the SIGs, there is Women football Association, yet, they have their special package.

Busoga: Then the player association, we are the clubs that employ those players, just forward that portion to clubs and we will know what to do.

Vipers: like the ‘FUFA administration’, I thought they had received their share already in operational fund earlier sent by FIFA. The same amount FUFA said that it will also be used to pay referees, FUFA staff, national teams and so on.

Magogo: That Sh30m for FUFA administration will cover the losses suffered in Sponsorship during the pandemic.

MYDA: The allocation shows that Futsal has eight teams, but they were only six last season!

Wakiso: Sh100m for Youth National Teams. Really??

Mbarara: Something is not right.

Wakiso: Like I said, the Sh32m they are giving us will only help us for just a month.

KCCA: The sh32m will make some difference, but we should have been involved before FUFA allocated these Covid19 relief funds to member associations.

*Till Next Sunday

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